12. Hello, howdy, good day and now fuck off. Oh I’m only teasing. I love to hear from you and all your funny problems. Some I can relate to and others are just off the wall. I love it! What an extraordinary week I have had. I was thrilled to hear about Friends reuniting for a one off special and was even more thrilled to be asked to take Matthew Perry's character, Chandler, as he has been incinerated. If you look closely at the photo I posted on Instagram and Twitter you will see that it is in fact me, Molly Mushroom, dressed up as him and not Chandler, himself. The magic of makeup! (I am on the far right by the way.) I was asked why Courtney Cox had a needle sticking out her forehead in the picture and all I can say is that it is none of our business.

I have desperately exciting news to tell you. I am thrilled to announce that I have finally got the hang of how to do a selfie. If you compare the two pictures below you can see the difference immediately. I am proud to say that I can now, like every teenage girl in the world, resemble a stunned trout.

First attempt.      When I decided to join a dating agency.                                                                                                               

My hundreth attempt. Cool hey!

 

 

 

 

Molly, hello, how are you? I just wanted to write to you and let you know that I am a big fan. You’re cool! I was just wondering if you have any good jokes? Steve, Plymouth

What did saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? ‘If we don't get some support soon people are going to think we’re nuts.’ Love Molly X

 

Dear Molly, I have just recently had some good luck and sold some of my paintings in an exhibition. I am thrilled with this as I have never sold anything before. The problem is this: I have a couple of friends who, although said they are happy, keep making snide and subtle comments suggesting that my paintings are not that good. They are also artists and do have some luck in selling their work but not a great deal. I’m feeling a bit deflated now as I feel like I deserve some good luck but sad that my friends are behaving like this towards me. What have I done? Gill, Farnborough.

 Hi Gill and thank you for your email. It does seem to me that the green eyed monster has reared its ugly head and manipulated your friends feelings into that of resentment. To put it another way, I believe that it should have been your friends who emailed me to work out where their jealousy stems from and for me to give them a bollocking for their behaviour towards you. Success does funny things to people when they are the ones who do not get it. Not everyone takes it well. Things like this happen all the time in every circumstance: A friend gets a promotion, a friend has success in their business, a friend falls pregnant, a friend has amazing sex and multiple orgasms: the list goes on. Sadly people will always try and put you down and ruin it for you IF YOU LET THEM! Luckily, for you, as you seem like an intelligent person, you will not let this happen, recognise that it is them with an issue and wonder if you really want people in your life who fail to be happy with your wonderful and earned success. People do not like others to have what they cannot. Sad fact of life.

What I picked up on here was that you said ‘luck’. Why was it luck that you sold those paintings? You are suggesting that they were not sold on the merit that they are bloody brilliant and would be fought over in an auction. Your talent and you selling your work boils down to this: You are talented and people want to buy your work. Yes you were in the right place at the right time, but positivity and belief in yourself goes a long way. Love Molly X